I have been seriously thinking about ditching the internet dating. I resent paying to be snubbed by men I haven't even met. I know men already who are all too happy to snub me for free. Besides so far in this dating malarkey, let's face it, there have not been any success stories. Remember Cravat Man? Pilot Man? Need I go on?
The latest cyberman is intriguing though. Let me introduce you to 'Composer Man'. A self confessed workaholic his photograph shows a fierce looking man with a tousle of dark hair and a large glass of wine. The wine is a good indication surely? The fierce look is a little intimidating but then I decided that it was a good thing that he didn't care that he looked all cross in his photograph. There are too many carefully posed photos of the cybermen out there which is always a little suspicious to my mind. My heart didn't go 'pitter patter' when I saw the photograph but then my heart rarely does that, and if it did I would suspect Angina rather than Love. Also, so far every one of the cybermen that I have met up with has looked like the second cousin to his own photo so they aren't that helpful as a judging aid.
Now I should warn you that composer man is not the world's greatest romantic. In fact he defines the classic repressed Englishman who has no tact and little concept of the effects of his conversation on those around him. Oh, you want proof of this do you? Ok, here goes. Here are just a couple of extracts from some of his e mails to me.
'I have to say I find the Welsh rather an odd bunch' This is always a good start to a blossoming relationship. Tell the welsh girl you think she comes from a nation of odd people!
'Your reply, within the limits of the English language , endears me to you.' Fabulously stilted and rather Georgian somehow. Actually this one got bonus points because he went on to say that I was a girl who 'transcends the ordinary'. So thumbs up for him on this one.
This one is my favourite 'I'm almost getting to like the sound of you.' I'm not sure what you are supposed to say to such an overwhelming compliment. Swoon gracefully away perhaps? The fact that he isn't getting to like me, but is almost getting there. Be still my beating heart. I think I'm having an angina attack....
Instead I took the plunge and suggested that we meet up. He has sent me his number and I have to be brave and ring him. I have no idea what to expect or what to say for that matter. 'Hello, I'm the odd welsh girl you almost like?' doesn't seem like the best opening ever. Any suggestions?
The price of health
1 day ago