So - here is a quick run down. Is there anything I have forgotten?
- My galoshes have been scrubbed clean,
- My striped bathing suit with exhausted elastic has been shaken free of anorexic moths along with my flower adorned bathing hat...
- I have casual clothes, smart clothes, in between clothes and not much to them clothes.
- Should I pack for snow? Just in case? I mean, this is the British summer so there is a far greater chance of a sudden snowfall than there is in the winter. OK - gloves, scarf and skiing trousers it is.
- I have deliberately forgotten my suncream in the hope that this will guarantee scorching days that I can't venture out into for fear of burning to a crisp and being mistaken by Rick Stein for a cornish lobster.
- I have packed an entire separate case of books in case nobody sells books in Cornwall.
- The loyal hound has a towel, his bowl and his favourite rubber chicken (I do wish he wouldn't sit on it when I am driving though as, out of the blue, it gives out this long and pained squealing which frightens the living daylights out of me)
- Naturally I have a tin opener and some tins of sardine paste. I didn't waste my time reading all those Famous Five novels for nothing.
- I have emptied the contents of my bathroom cupboard into a suitcase in the hope of actually using some of the products that I keep buying because they promise that they will make my hair so shiny I can be used as a solar panel / my eyelashes so long I'll trip over them/ my skin so soft that puppies will be envious.
At least if there is a holocaust while I am on holiday I will be able to last the whole thing out.
Ok - that's it then. I'm off. I'll be back in a week with my tales of sun, surf, expensive ice creams and hot men that I was too nervous to go up and talk to ....... That is assuming that the pixies don't get me.